This was taken before I had a bike accident and obviously my legs still worked. Actually it was taken by "Performance Bikes" magazines photographer for a feature in the magazine on bike leathers and took all day!  I did some work for the magazine for several years, and they needed someone my shape to look like a butcher and I was asked not to shave as well.... They obviously needed a fat scruffy unshaven slob for a model!

The idea was that the cows sat around the table drinking red wine and smoking cigars did not know what was coming to them.....
There is also a pile of one piece motorcycle racing leathers, laid in the middle of the table.

I used to design and build automotive (mainly motorcycle) chassis dynamometers (Rolling Roads) Also I built one of these fine computerized devices into a trailer, so that it could be used to test bikes for power and torque, at racetracks, and drag strips, and produce power and torque curves (graphs) for motorcycle publications such as Performance Bikes, MCN, Bike, etc. To go to this now quite old separate site click here! Or a newer site here!

I also used to build Nitrous Oxide Injection systems or "kits" as people refer to them. These boost horsepower to high levels in an infernal combustion engine...  If you are interested in this stuff and how to build your own system I put a couple of pages up here!

And I am also into gas turbines, pulsejet engines, and APU devices and have another site here! (Yes home designed and built jet engines!) and a quick page on this site here

Ok that all happened before I had an accident. I crashed a 1200 Suzuki into a ditch......
I broke my neck, back (at T4 with complete spinal cord injury at this point) all of my ribs, some of which punctured my lungs and caused internal bleeding and collapsed lungs, and my right femur which had to be pinned (if a half inch titanium bar two foot long is a pin!) and was airlifted from the roadside by the Lincolnshire air ambulance to Lincoln accident and emergency unit where I spent the next 6 weeks in a coma with pipes and wire in places that I didn't even know I had, including about 6 extra temporary holes that I never had before..... Not something that I would recommend to anyone.

I was moved after the six weeks to a specialist spinal unit in Sheffield also by helicopter, (I like flying but kind of missed this..) and stayed here for a year recovering and coming to terms with life in a wheelchair due to being paralyzed from the chest down. Still it was fun causing all kinds of havoc with the hospital computer system, and some of the patients! I also organized a takeaway eating event every night for the whole spinal unit (3 wards in its own building) as I had my mobile phone in there, against their rules, and it became so popular that even the nurses were eating Indian/Chinese etc every night. The money took a bit of sorting out though....

Stupid smile.....

Likes....

• Well I am single so I like attractive small young fit blonde women without children!  Contact me! - I am serious!!!  My lovely Yugoslav girlfriend who I met 5 years ago on the net left me after living with me for three years. (Here if you are interested) She is still lovely both on the inside and the outside, and she still sees me as a friend on most days.

• Speed! (the mph kind) I am addicted!

• Beer!

• Vodka with Bitter Lemon or traditional Lemonade or by itself...

• My Van! Click here and a new site here

• Drag racing

• Bikes 750 upwards only!

• Intelligence (Yes I do have some - official IQ154, means above 99.97 percent of the population at large.. which I still find amazing)

• Sunshine

• Things done properly (Don't suffer fools at all well)

• Physics/Logic/Engineering/Electronics/Computers

• My new tuned (!) and modified electric wheelchair

• Honesty

• Chinese/Indian/Kebabs and most spicy foods

• Model airplanes, and helicopters.

• Gas turbines and pulse jet engines - home made of course!

Dislikes...

• Dishonesty

• Unreliable people

• Thick people!

• People that never call back when they say they will

• Cabbage

• Safety Nazis

• Speed limits

• Traffic cops

• Licensing laws

• Religions - all of them!

• The salt they put down on the road for 7 months of the year to rot everyone's cars/wheelchairs/motorcycles. Its hydroscopic so actually keeps the roads wet and slimy too! for 90 percent of the time. so it probably causes more accidents than it prevents! What a great idea.

• People that are not logical

• Moody women...

• Football - hate it with a passion! Most of them have trouble grunting their own name properly.

• Babies - What's that all about?

• Bill Gates - Although I use all his best software!

• Cold

• Wind (both kinds...)

• Brussel sprouts (yuk)

• Politicians

• Birds that keep crapping on my van!

• Bike crashes (been there)

• Explosions (been there too, another few months in hospital..)

And a very apt joke....

An Irishman was drinking at the pub all night. The bartender came up to him and told him that the bar was closing. So the Irishman stood up to leave and fell flat on his face. He tried to stand up one more time with the same result. So he figured he'd just crawl outside, hang out for a while, get some fresh air and hopefully that would sober him up. Once outside he stood up and fell again-right on his face. So he decided to crawl the 4 blocks to his home and when he arrived at the door he tried one more time with the same results. Exhausted, he then gave up and started crawling to the bedroom. When he reached his bed he tried one more time to stand up. This time he managed to pull himself upright but he quickly fell right into the bed and fell sound asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow. The next morning, he woke up with his wife standing over him shouting at him. "So, you've been out drinking again!!" "What makes you say that?" He asked as he put on an innocent look. "The pub called, you left your wheelchair there again."

Now lastly, another "Like"........